Water’s Wet, The World Is Round, And Andrew Luck Compliments Opponents After Getting Sacked

2011 NCAA Football - 2011 Pacific-12 Conference Media Day - July 26, 2011

ESPN – Indianapolis Colts quarterback Andrew Luck has started to confound pass rushers not by his impressive play, but by congratulating defenders for hard hits… Luck has become known to dole out “nice play, buddy” and “good hit” kudos almost as often as he finds wide receivers open down the field.

“In all the years I’ve played football I have never heard anything like it,”Washington Redskins linebacker Ryan Kerrigan told the Wall Street Journal. “Nothing even close.”

“I’m like ‘what’s going on? Aren’t you supposed to be mad?’ ” Philadelphia Eagles defensive back Nolan Carroll told the newspaper. “So then I’m the one who gets ticked off because an upbeat attitude isn’t something you see.”

Just the most perfect, predictable news of all time. Andrew Luck is Peyton Manning meets Ishmael Boorg with a well-to-do father named Oliver.  Just a nerd of epic proportions who gets his jollies off playing the game “the right way,” giving it 110%, and treating others the way he wants to be treated.  ESPN posted this story tonight but I easily could have told you this back in his Stanford days.  On a night where America had to suffer through the embarrassing, obvious decay of Smoking Jay and the Chicago Bears organization, the World Wide Leader snuck this little tidbit onto the main page to remind everyone how a real winner conducts himself. Gotta push that agenda.  Andrew Luck congratulates JJ Watt after a sack and thanks his Creator for the chance to continue competing. That’s why he’s Peyton Manning Reincarnate and Jay Cutler is nothing more than an overpaid beer league captain.  If you think there’s any other way to win one world championship against Rex Grossman & Co, you’re badly fucking fooled, my friend.

But seriously, Andrew, be less Pennsylvania Dutch.  Drink a few beers on your off day, say a curse word, maybe even yell at a teammate when he sucks.  Do a little more Tom Brady. Now that’s a man’s man. Or just continue living the most boring rumspringa in the history of sports. Never gonna win championships (plural) and see frosted nipples (plural) without dialing up the thermostat. Get angry, talk some trash, dance with the devil, make sex to women, hoist trophies. That’s a little thing called a playbook for ya, Andy.

P.S. – How much does Luck hate Any Given Sunday?  Probably tried to quit Pop Warner because the harsh language made him want to be a surgeon instead. Such a dork.

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