Chinese Dude Sues Ex-Wife For Producing Hideous Spawn

Chinese Dude Sues Ex-Wife For Producing Hideous Spawn

http://nypost.com/2013/11/07/wife-must-pay-120k-for-disclosing-plastic-surgeries/

A court in northern China has sided with an angry ex-husband, who sued his estranged wife for marrying him without disclosing her previous plastic surgeries.

Fuming husband Feng Jian only found out about her wife’s scalpel-aided touch-ups after she gave birth to their baby daughter who was “ugly beyond description,” according to court papers cited by the Sina News.

Feng initially suspected his wife of having an affair. But after DNA tests proved he was the ugly duckling’s biological dad, she fessed up to having done $100,000 worth of cosmetic surgeries before they met.

A court ordered her to pay him $120,000 for his claims of marriage under false pretenses.

First thing’s first: This guy, Feng Jian, is a scumbag. Get over yourself, man. You ain’t no spring chicken either. Sure, as far as weird Chinese dudes go, you’re probably like an 8, but that gives you no right to disown your hideous newborn daughter. I know the rules might be a little different over there, but that’s YOUR DAUGHTER. If she’s a hideous baby, she’s YOUR HIDEOUS BABY.

However, the actual lawsuit that this Feng character filed (and won) was against his estranged wife accusing her of marriage under false pretenses. In this regard, I’m totally on board with Feng. Just look at this Before/After shot:

lawsuit_20121102104203_320_240

That disaster on the left is gonna pop out a bunch of little goblins 100 times out of 100. Doesn’t matter how many children the Commy Republic will allow, they’re all gonna be putrid. My man Feng entered into this marriage thinking that he was in line to raise a slew of Lucy Luis and Daniel Dae Kims. Instead, he ends up with a future Sumo champ (kinda cool, actually) and two little Tibetan Macaques that he’ll never be able to auction off for marriage. So, yeah, I guess I understand his gripe. Let’s just hope he doesn’t abandon the children, too.

Moral of the story: If you were previously a hideous human being, be sure to warn your significant other. They won’t care, because every single one of us is a superficial asshole. If you’re hot, you’re hot, we’ll never know the difference and will still want to make sex to you. Full disclosure = no lawsuit.

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